The starting problem.
I have always had this problem every since
my childhood. I get aroused (yeah, I know what you are thinking), I meant I get
inspired by something and that is short-lived. Even today I have had spells of
instant rejuvenation and refreshing moments that are alive for a few hours, few
days, few weeks or just few minutes and then I sulk into my own comfortable
thought process that convinces me that it is not worth the effort. Just be
happy with what you have or I'm just incapable of achieving it, or I am not 'lucky'
enough like the rest of the crowd or I am luckier than most of them who don't
even deserve what I have.
What happened in school: I would always
look at my report card that placed me anywhere between 5th and 10th position in class and the very moment the adrenaline
rush would help me resolve to change my situation and become that first rank
student. Alas, the momentary boost is so short-lived, I would just convince
myself that I am not that bad after all. There are students in my class who are
way beyond my current position and that soothes my heart and I am contended in
what I have already got.
Gratitude you see, we should be grateful
for what we already have and not lament on what we do not or cannot have. But
doesn’t that make us a loser, oh yes! It does make us a loser, it did make me a
loser. I was happy with the status-quo and time and again I would see the
dashboard on my report card showing me nothing less than 10 or sometimes it
would go up to 15. If you are wondering what these numbers are, we were ranked
from 1 to XX depending on the number of students in the class for the
exams/tests conducted to evaluate our performance. People who scored greater
than or equal to 35 out of 100 in the aggregate would be ranked from 1 to XX by
taking all subjects into consideration. People who got 2nd or 3rd rank would be
more disappointed than I am and I never understood their concern, why should I,
I was lot better than the 15-20 students I had left behind.
Come college: It was hard to get an
admission in a college of your choice, not that they were against me, but my
report card had a strange look that no one wanted to invest time to mould my
career. That was the first loss (of opportunity) I had to cope with. I resolved
to change this situation and make it better in the coming days and as always it
happened. I saw that I was better than others, did you say complacent, yes in a
way I was.
From initial years of work life to today:
Its the same, momentary bursts of emotions, that fire in the belly attitude
which tells me that I can take on the whole world and appear bright and
successful, the thoughts that appear to my mind every night before I go to
sleep. And when I am just about to begin my day the next morning, all that I
want is to pass yet another day without any surprises, I am so comfortable you
see, a air-conditioned office, a reasonable career graph and a sustainable take
home pay, what else do you want. Such a loser I must say!
One of the best lines that I have heard from my taxation teacher (I'm
sure most of the students in the south pursuing Chartered Accountancy will
relate to it) when he taught us was to question ourselves - If not YOU, who will
do it. If not NOW, when will you do it. Moments of adrenaline rush, excitement,
the power of the entire universe resides within me on pondering over this
thought and as soon I let my mind wander, it consoles me to stay within my
limits, it tells me I am an average person and what I already have is more that
what I can ask for.
No, no, no... your mind is limitless,
boundless says Swami Vivekananda. If you think you can, you will, if you think
you cant, you wont. So arise, awake and stop not till the goal is reached...
now again you see the emotions charging at you to take that extra effort and
push yourself so hard that you know its almost impossible for you, for you are
Mr. so and so and your limits have already been tested. Stop not till the goal
is reached, but then what was my goal, what is my goal? I HAVE already reached
it, I may now stop. Relax! Let the mind be peaceful, lets not worry about the
goal right now, slow your breathing and let the emotions calm down.
You see that, charged up emotions refuses
to resonate with you when you try to push them hard.
When it comes to investments: The same
rules apply here, why should I start investing NOW. I am only 32, I still have
to buy a lot of things for myself, my wife, my kids or I just want to see the
recent movie, eat something at the newly opened restaurant in my neighbourhood,
buy that expensive phone no one else has yet and make that trip to the dream
destination for my honeymoon. I can think of investing later. Later? but when?
Slowly you know you are left behind, true
that there are people who are worse off than you are and you should be thankful
that you have in abundance in comparison. Raise your bar and you will see that
there are many who are ahead of you who are much better than you are, because YOU think that way and can make you look timid, stupid and dumb!
You may say its a state of mind, how to
make best use of this is left to you. I have wasted most of my time convincing
myself that I have enough and I should be grateful. On the other hand I have
also cursed myself on having missed a lot of opportunities which otherwise
would have changed the course of my direction in life, be it personal or
professional - procrastination, complacency, sheer laziness and lethargic
approach to everything in life has actually pushed me 100 or more ranks behind
if I have to put in on my report card dashboard today.
In today's world when everything gets
evaluated with the money or money's worth you have, start saving and investing
TODAY. Don't get left behind, there are always people who will have less money
than you have and there will always be people making more money than you make.
Always look forward, be greedy, it doesn't hurt.
After all, its all about money honey!
